Unsuspected traveler’s blues| India

The sky was looming with the promise of bad weather when I set out for breakfast. I’ve learned quickly that the weather arrives from over the Dhauladhars Ridge (big snowy mountain range) to the north, and that if one can see dark clouds over them, it will mean eventual dark clouds here.

Looking for comfort, I ordered the “farmer’s breakfast” which turned out to be a delicious omelet with tomatoes, onions and potatoes, with the whole thing being covered with cheese. Nostalgia came over me as a slowly ate my food: soon I would have to leave this town, and head back into the disappointing food of Delhi.

I noticed on the bookshelf a book belonging to a series a read a book from while in Pushkar. I had read the “last” (at the time of printing, but no longer) book of the series, and here was the first. I looked outside the window – the weather was cold and gray. The coffee shop / restaurant was warm and comfortable. I decided to grab the book and read. I had no plans for today anyway!

Over more food and a few cups of tea, I read the whole 300+ pages in one sitting. It had been a while since I had read so much so fast, and it was really, really nice. Nice to be doing something that I don’t often get the opportunity to do (and never did back home): sit in a café and lazily let the day pass by. It was lovely to have a constant buzz around from fellow travelers and monks, eating, chatting or simply just passing time. It was also nice to be somewhere with so much technology around: laptops, iPads and iPhones, Kindles… it was almost as if I could be back home.

I feel so comfortable here; I’m not looking forward to leaving. Delhi has no cute, cozy cafes, no Wi-Fi everywhere, no great food (I am only referencing the tourist ghetto here, although what I’ve seen elsewhere didn’t seem any better). I don’t know what to expect of Eastern Europe, but I do hope that it will have what most of us associate with Europe: great food, great cafes, and hopefully great places to sightsee and hang out. (Oh, and please, let the weather change and warm up! I am not equipped for snow…)

I think that part of me is tired, tired of always moving, traveling. Tired of the unexpected, of limited possibilities. I know that it’s just temporary, and I still get excited about so many thing, but right now, I really want “home”.

So much of it just feels like going with the motion, going along with it all – whatever that is. I’ve seen wonderful places, but I just haven’t had any real excitement about anything in a long time. Thailand, Bangladesh, India – they are lovely for so many different reasons, but they aren’t my cup of tea. I want to feel amazed, alive, thrilled, exuberant. Isn’t that what I should be feeling, traveling the world? Why can’t I feel anything but fleeting moments of it? I want to find that place that fills my heart, somewhere that I just can’t get enough of. I want to be reminded of why I’m here and why I’m doing this. I want to find the drive to keep going, and I want to feel gratitude for the ability to be doing what I am doing.
Is it normal that after 222 days / 7 months of traveling, that I’ve become jaded to it? That it would all seem… ordinary?

Fellow travelers, do you know what I’m talking about? And if so, how did you get over it?

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About Magalie

Canadian girl living in Texas, off to see the world when she can!
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8 Responses to Unsuspected traveler’s blues| India

  1. Laura says:

    Aww, Maggie, I’m sorry. When I knew you were going travelling for so long, I did wonder if this would happen to you as it always does to me when I travel for an extended period of time. When you’re sightseeing every day, it does become ordinary… you do it EVERY DAY. I’m a homebody so it hits me much sooner than you… somewhere around 2 months seems to be my max. And then I need to either go home, go somewhere else that’s familiar, or just settle down and quit sightseeing for a week or two. Just do day-to-day things like you did today… read. Watch a movie. Email people at home. Go grocery shopping! Cook, if that’s possible. Do laundry. You know, the stuff that seems so banal at home can seem novel again when you’ve been so busy marvelling at new things every day for months on end.

    I think that going somewhere like Eastern Europe may help, honestly. Mainly because I expect it will be very different from the places you’ve been, like India, Bangladesh, Thailand etc. Having something that really is a new experience may help to jolt you out of this.

    I hope this helps, I don’t have any other great solution unfortunately 😦

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    • Magalie says:

      Thanks Laura! I’ve been doing mostly that – nothing, with a little bit of lazy sightseeing here and there. It hasn’t seemed to help – in fact I think it’s making things worse! I think that doing “homely” things and finally eating good good and enjoying internet (in my room, no less!) has been making me miss home more. I think I’m all confused!

      I’ve been feeling very neglectful of sightseeing over the past while, ignoring so many sights and just not bothering to try. It’s sad, really… When am I going to be back here to check all that I’ve skipped? I know that I can’t see it all or do it all, but I’ve just been taking it to an extreme. I’m hoping that you’re right and that experiencing something so different from what I’ve been seeing – getting out of Asia – will serve to rekindle the flame and get me moving / enjoying again.

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  2. Ashley says:

    Mags…take a deep breath and know that its ok not to see everything. Its ok to just have a normal day – or at least as normal as you can make it. A day where its ok just to have breakfast and then lie in bed and not care that there’s a crazy festival out in the street. Travelling does this – and at different times it hits in different ways. You’re going to see your mom soon right? That will be a little bit of home and you’ll be good to go until you see trav’s family in Africa. Take a deep breath, allow yourself to not see everything, allow yourself to email home, blog whats interesting to you. From someone who’s so far away – you are seeing a millions things, more than most people in a lifetime, so please sit back, relax, drink tea, take a deep breath and just enjoy. ps..check your email and i’ll send you an update from home xoxo

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    • Magalie says:

      Thanks Ash! I’m really trying to just “do nothing”, and the rain today is helping. I’ll try to find a solution… And yes, I’m meeting my mom in May, it will be fantabulous!

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  3. Anne says:

    You could always come to France for a bit. You and Travis have a home here, and my last day of work is tomorrow. I know that France isn’t on your itinerary, and that the chance of you suddenly arriving with all the plans you’ve made is most likely out of the question anyway – but I’m eternally hopeful! We wouldn’t have to do any of the touristy stuff (unless you felt like it). We could just do things like walk to the lake and have a picnic and talk about regular stuff.

    I’m sure you’ll find your way out of this slump one way or another. Hopefully it’ll happen soon!

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    • Magalie says:

      Oh Anne, that is *so* super tempting to me! It would be so nice to see you and get to hang out. Even though we can’t picnic in Versaille right now, I think about it often! I’ll keep it in mind though, you never know what will happen! And I’ve heard that Europe has a lot of cheap flights…

      I can’t believe that your last day is tomorrow, it’s going by so fast!

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  4. Ginger says:

    I would think the travleler’s blues are inevitable after 7 or 8 months of traveling. It happened to me the first time we went to Italy and we were only gone 10 days! I remember when we got to Rome I said, “Yep, its a ruin. Can we go now?” And that was at the Collosseum!!!!!!!!!

    Remember too that you can get a direct flight to Houston from anywhere in the world! You will always have a home here in Texas!!!

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    • Magalie says:

      Oh Ginger, you make me laugh! I know that feeling though, and it sucks! It’s annoying to feel that way somewhere like that, where you’re supposed to feel all impressed and awed and such. It gives me a dose of Catholic guilt…

      While I could fly to Houston, I’d be turned around at the border… but I bet I could fly to Mexico instead! That’s close enough, right?

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